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Onomaブログ

同人創作サークル「Onoma」のメンバーが、自分の考えや思想を垂れ流すブログです。

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[PR]上記の広告は3ヶ月以上新規記事投稿のないブログに表示されています。新しい記事を書く事で広告が消えます。

あらためて、Onomaの活動の根源に立ち返る

どうも、Webページも更新しない(更新するネタがない)Onomaのまんじゅ(´ん`)です。

変な時間に目が覚めてしまったので、こんな時間にブログ描いてます。

さて、ここ最近は妙に交流する人間が哲学的な人が多く、そのためか、
「あー、コレってOnomaの考えに繋がってくなあ」
と思ったので、だらだらと。チラシの裏程度の読み物だと思ってください。


以前、このブログ立ち上げ当初、サークル長のかげぎすが大体書いたような気がしますが。
(もしくはOnoma立ち上げ時の時かな?)

彼は当時、哲学を専攻している大学院生で、哲学そのものの研究は面白いものの、結局論文を書いたところで読む人間は限られる。であれば小説を書き、物語をモデルケースにした哲学論を展開していくのが、一番幅広い人に哲学に触れてもらうことができるのではないか。という趣旨で始まった気がします。

当時24歳の私は、正直申し上げますと、
「ほう、面白い。哲学の面白さをそう伝えようとするか」
とおもう反面、
「はあ、立派な大義名分だことで……」
と思っていたのも事実です。

時は流れて3年、私も30手前になりました。それでも学ぶこと、気づくことってあるなと思った次第です。

お金のために生きてないか?

私の出身は別海町という、釧路と根室の間辺りのだだっ広い、チモシーとクローバーが一面に広がる、牛が人口の3倍は居るど田舎です。

そんなど田舎の遊びの殆どは、パチンコか車遊び、もうちょっと良くて麻雀といった具合です。
別に悪いことじゃないだろうけど、素直に申し上げると、
「お前ら、そんなに頭使わなくて楽しいのか?」
と。

いや、麻雀だって、突き詰めれば確率論に基づいた最善手の算出を一瞬で行わなければならないでしょうし、車遊びだってチューニングアップの果には科学・物理学が絶対絡んできます。
ただ、自分の周りではそういう連中は正直見なかった。経験則による技術で何とか乗り切る。そんなものでした。

別海町の主産業は酪農業と漁業ですが、それでさえも大半の人達が経験則による技術で乗り切ってるのではないかと。生物学の奥深いところまで学んでる人たちって居るのだろうかと思ったりするのです。

「そこまでつきつめてなにがたのしいの? 飯の種になるの?」
ごもっとも。それでもって、楽しくない人たちはそこで立ち止まってて別にいいと私は思います。若干の嘲笑を含んで。(そういう思想に陥るのが私の悪いところだとは自負しております)

ところ変わって北見・札幌。この環境はまだ良かったです。

仕事以外でコンピューター科学について探求する仲間が居るのは、今思うと素晴らしい体験だとおもいますし、そういう機会に恵まれていた自分が本当に幸せものだなと思う次第です。

ただ、そんな勉強会やサークルから離れて仕事に戻ると、そんな探究心なぞ全く無いのではないか、ただお金に振り回されてる大人たちに、正直うんざりしてしまってる自分がいます。

ここまで書いて何がいいたいか。どうも皆、「λ労働 お金.生存」みたいな図式でしか生きて無くないか?
自分はそんな疑問を最近いだき始めました。

「で、その『考え事』とやらはお金になって?」

ドフトエフスキーの「罪と罰」で出てきた台詞だと記憶しております。

これに対する私の答えは、もちろん、
「いいや」
です。

しかし、僕の場合続きがあります。
「お金に執着する世の中が狂ってるんだよ。人間は『自分達が食べる分だけの食べ物を自然からもらって、後はひたすら考え事する』くらいがちょうどよくないか?」
といった具合の、理想論です。

それが合わない人だってもちろん居るでしょう。そういう人はそれで別にいいんです。
「自分はこれができる。これが得意で人の役にも立つ」
と確信できる技術をお持ちなら、それを研磨すればいい。

ただ、私個人としては、そうして研磨した技術の行く先も、結局哲学とか、科学の世界に足を踏み入れざる負えない。つまり人間は考える生き物にならざるおえない。と最近は思っております。

考え事に集中できる田舎を

最近、私自身地元に帰りたいということはどこかしこで申し上げてると思います。

ただ、そこにはくだらない野望があります。

「考え事に集中し、対話し、議論を重ねて自己や他者の価値観を研磨していく環境を作る」
という馬鹿げた話です。

「そんなんじゃお金稼いで生活できないじゃん」
ごもっとも。しかしながら、若干の初期投資は必要なものの、何とか自分が食べていく方法があるかなと空想を膨らませている今日この頃です。

空想にも何らかのきっかけがないと膨らみませんね。
言ってしまえば、「自然農法」という物を知ったために、そういうことを考えるようになりました。

畑は耕さない、肥料もまかない、農薬も使わない。ただ多種多様な種を畑にまき、目を掛けるだけ。
それでできた農作物と、肉が食べたくなったときだけ狩猟に行って狩ってくる。
そして空いた時間は思考と創作に没頭する。
自然という名の巨人の肩の上に乗って生存する。それだけ。

そーんな夢物語を別海町に帰って実現してみたいなと。
祖父母が矢臼別演習場に土地を全部売っぱらうつもりでいるくらいなら、周りの町民に馬鹿にされながらも、自分の思考に没頭し、創作する生活のほうがよっぽど幸せに思えてくる今日この頃なのです。

「アホくさ」
という方はそのままブラウザの「戻る」ボタンか、「閉じる」ボタンをクリックしてください。その方がお互いの幸せのためだ。

「面白いね(嘲笑含む)」
と思った奇遇な方、僕と話しませんか。こちらの記事のコメント欄でも構いませんし、Twitterアカウントは@manzyunでやっていたりします。

以上、私の眠れぬ未明から明朝にかけてのくだらない話にお付き合い頂き有難うございます。

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